Her Story

GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME, and ALL THE TIME GOD IS GOOD!! I give all glory and honor to God who is the head of our life.

Before I met my Husband…

April 29, 2002.  I made a covenant with God that I will forever serve and worship Him.  I was at a point of no return!  I decided to start an intimate relationship with God allowing Him to lead my lifestyle.  Part of that intimacy with God was a 2 year dating sabbatical.  I used this time to be purged of all uncleanliness, because God can only use a clean vessel (2 Timothy 2:19-21).  I began to read His word, meditate on His word day and night (Psalms 1: 2), study His word,  and show myself approved (2 Timothy 2:15).

Now don’t get me wrong.  Two years by yourself and wondering if you will ever marry can be difficult.  There were MANY times when I became LONELY.  There were times when I asked God, why me?, Don’t I deserve a companion?  Aren’t I good enough? Lord are you punishing me? There were times that I was tempted but quickly remembered by covenant.  My covenant with God was to serve Him and Him only, and asked Him to give me the fruits of the Spirit ( Galatians 5:21-23).  I also asked for the faith of Job (Goodness, I know you are thinking, why did you ask for that!).  On that date I wrote my vision and made it plain (Habakkuk 2:2-4).  I wrote specifics on what I wanted in a husband, (From his spiritual groundedness, to the way he treats his mother, to the way he makes me laugh, to him loving me the way Christ loved the church, to his height and complexion, etc…I was Specific!

( Philippians 4:6).  I also stated that I wanted to only COURT my husband, God’s way, In the Spiritual Realm, not secular (That means, NO SEX, NO WORLDLY DATING VIEWS, ONLY BIBLICAL- TOTALLY DIFFERENT FROM WHAT THE WORLD THINKS)  I didn’t want to DATE the way the World defines dating.  I also stated that I wanted my relationship in COURTING to be a 2 – 3 month process…..I thought,  “What human validation do you need for what God has already ordained”…BUT FIRST, I knew that whatever I desired, God would give to me, BUT in His time…..so I waited.  and waited…….Weeks went by….months went by……years went by….BUT in the MEANtime while waiting, God became my husband (Isaiah 54:5).  I needed to develop myself and become the woman, the wife, and the vessel God wanted me to be and use.  God says in His word.. Proverbs 18:22 ”He who finds a wife finds a good thing, And obtains favor from the LORD.”   So I knew he had to FIND ME, and all I can do is WAIT.  Also, I knew I needed to be the wife to Christ FIRST, to prepare me for the role as wife for my husband……

We met…..

In February 2004, I hosted/facilitated a 40 days of Purpose bible study group at my home.  The sessions were each Sunday for 6 weeks.  We shared our intimate thoughts and experienced spiritual breakthrough each and every week.  I knew that the next 40 days would be a profound transformation in my life, I felt it.  I just didn’t know how profound.  I did know however that I would be able to see my purpose in life clearer than I had ever seen before.  Around the 2^{nd –  week} of class was my birthday.  At church we had a One night revival on my birthday.  Service was good as usual, but something unusual occurred.  During a part in the sermon the Bishop had us to hug our neighbor and speak something to them(What I don’t remember), BUT I REMEMBER THIS….I was seated on the left side of the church, minding my own business.  I started to hug different individuals, and all of a sudden I looked to my far right and notice a particular female “Kendra” running from her seat, in the front of the church, then right in front of me.  (Now keep in mind there were probably 800 – 1000 folks that night, but I only saw her) She looked me dead in the eyes(it was like she was looking through me), pointed at me and said  “ What you have been praying for and waiting on is coming, it’s coming this week”.  That was on March 11^th.  That Sunday on March 14^th, Oshe showed up at my front door.  Now at the time, I didn’t put two and two together.

A member in the 40 days group “Beth” invited him, and honestly I felt he was a little suspect.  I had seen him around church for 2 years.  I never saw him dating one woman, so it seemed he was single, BUT I ALWAYS SAW WOMAN FLOCK AROUND HIM.  So I just categorized/judged  him as a player.  Plus, honestly in undergrad I had always negatively categorized men of Omega Psi Phi Fraternity(I went to an HBCU so I’d seen some things) as “nasty ques”.  So that combination was not enticing at all….Moving on…He showed up at my door.  We had our discussion and YALL, when everyone left, I HAD TO REPENT TO GOD!!!!!!!!!  I had JUDGED HIM UNFAIRLY.  This brother was SPIRITUALLY GROUNDED!!!  I was so drawn to him and constantly prayed about it.  I tried to fight the feelings but I couldn’t.  He was constantly in my thoughts.  I DIDN’T LET HIM KNOW!!  I acted uninterested.  I WANTED HIM TO FIGURE ME OUT(The advice of my grandma and momma).  We would correspond occasionally throughout the week – I still only said just enough, I wanted to leave some mystery to myself.  On Sundays I made sure what I cooked was to his liking…He didn’t know it, but I would plan all week what the meal would be, and added that extra down south flavor, that only “Big momma” had.  We would have collard greens, sweet potato pie, red velvet, mac and cheese, corn bread, smothered chicken, etc…  Each week, I was soooooooo excited and nervous at the same time, and prayed that I would remain focus on leading the discussions.

The group discussions were more and more intimate and I found myself falling in love with him. (Of course he didn’t know)  He eventually asked me out on a date.  The first time I declined, then the second time I declined.  On the 3^rd time I accepted (Momma said, make a man chase you, If he wants you, he’ll go out of his way to try to get youJ)

The rest of course is history.  He officially asked me to court him.  He knew my views on courting and that I only wanted to date/court my husband.  Our views were IDENTICAL!!!!  We began to spend so much time together.  His thoughts were my thoughts, my thoughts were his thoughts.  We finished each others sentences.  We knew our spirits were connected.  I knew he was my husband.  He fit everything on my list that I made 2 years ago and then some.(Ephesians 3:20)  Our purposes in life are the same and we knew our role as husband and  wife were the remaining pieces of the puzzle needed to propel us both into God’s purpose for both of our lives.  God kept giving us affirmation,  after affirmation, after affirmation,  to marry….we knew we needed to be obedient.  When God says move, you gotta move, sooooooooooooo…..

He proposed on May 11, 2004 on bended knee.  I kneeled down with him as we prayed together and 7 days later on May 18, 2004 we married.  We had a private/intimate ceremony with both parents and family.

Unbeknownst to Me…..

• Oshe had watched me over the past 2 years.  He remembered a testimony “verbatim” I gave in front of the church in 2002.
• Oshe had been praying for a wife for the past year, but really became focused on the next phase of his life after he was baptized in September 2003..
• Oshe didn’t know he was being invited to my home that particular Sunday.  He was actually apart of another group.  His initial plans were to just come and get a Sunday dinner just on this one time occasion cause he heard of the type of meals that were cooked.
• God had changed the plans of Oshe that week.  He was scheduled to go out of town that week, but something happened, and plans were canceled……God knew.
• Oshe also had previous plans to travel every weekend there after for awhile, but he canceled/postponed all those plans so he could be at my home each and every week.

Encouragement…..

(Please note….this is our story/miracle, tailored made by GOD just for us.   If you recall, Jesus never did a miracle the same way in the bible, But what holds true is HIS WORD.  And HE DOESN’T LIE.  He might not come when you want Him to, BUT He comes RIGHT ON TIME.  We pray that you are encouraged)

To woman everywhere I say KEEP THE FAITH!!  You HAVE TO FOLLOW God’s Word COMPLETELY!!!  You can NOT compartmentalize your life!! Follow what the bible says about reading and living His word DAILY, about SEXUAL PURITY(WE HAD NO SEX UNTIL MARRIAGE), about your attitude (2 Timothy 2:22-26), and about TURSTING GOD IN EVERY FACET OF YOUR LIFE.

Top ten Scriptures that helped me during my singleness: 1)Galatians 6:9, 2)1 Corinthians 15:58 3)Mark 11:22-24, 4)John 15:7, 5)Hebrews 10:36, 6) Hebrews 11:6, 7)1 Peter 4:12-13

8)1 John 3:22, 9)Ephesians 1:17 – 18, 10) Proverbs 31: 10 – 31